Friday, February 15, 2013

Lily-isms: on the subject of Jello

Lily: I don't want a little brother. I want a little sister...AND a BIG sister.
Kalyn: I think that ship might have sailed.

Lily: (to Carolyn) I have a magic wand and I will turn you to a big sister.
Erin: what will you turn me into?
Lily: you are the queen **poof**
Erin: Lily, you are a bright child. 

Eric: Do you remember how you said you'd really like a sibling?
Lily: Uh-huh. 
Eric: Well. Mommy and Daddy decided to grow one for you. In November, Mommy will go to the hospital and have your baby brother or sister. 
Lily: ::sudden, torrential wailing::
Mommy: Sweetheart, what's wrong!? We thought you'd be happy!
Lily: ::sniffling:: He said it might be a BROTHER!

Lily: When will my baby sister get here?
Mommy: well, it takes nine months to grow a baby, so Jello--who could be a brother--will get here in November. 
Lily: It takes too long to grow babies!

Mommy: when it's time for Jello to come out of Mommy's tummy, Mommy will have to go to the hospital. Daddy will have to come with me to take care of me. That means you will need to have a sleepover with one of the aunties. You could stay with Auntie Melissa, Uncle Chris and Taevin, or with Auntie Julia,  Uncle Cookie, and Andrew, or with Auntie Marnie and Uncle Toph...
Lily: Auntie Marnie!! Auntie Marnie!! Mommy? Can you go to the hospital now?

Lily: Mommy?
Mommy: Yes, dear?
Lily: in a few weeks, you're going to go to the doctor and he's going to pull out his magic wand and zap your tummy--don't worry, though, it won't hurt. THEN he can tell us if Jello is a sister or a brother. ::looks at me sternly:: Jello should be a SISTER. 

Lily: You went to the doctor and he took a picture of Jello with his special camera. And Jello lifted her little arm and waved at you!
Mommy: that's right. 
Lily: yep. She had little fingers and little toes and a cute little outfit. 
Mommy: um...Lily, babies don't get any clothes until they come OUT of mommy tummies. 
Lily: (with horror) You mean they're NEKKED!! 

Lily: When my baby sister is born you'll have two daughters!!
Mommy and Daddy: Yup. We will have two children. 
Lily: everyone will think she's sooooooooooo cute...and they'll think I'M Ah-maaaaaaaazing!

Monday, February 11, 2013

No Internet

Lily: I married Andrew. I'm going to stay with him forever!
Mommy: If you are going to stay with Andrew, do I get a Mother-In-Law cabin?
Lily: Yep
Mommy: And cable TV?
Lily: Yep
Mommy: And a recliner?
Lily: Yep
Mommy: And endless bon bons?
Lily: Yep
Mommy: Sounds like a good deal to me!
Daddy: What about Daddy?
Lily: I don't want to marry you! You're already married!
Daddy: No, can I stay with Mommy?
Lily: *thinks* Ok
Daddy: And have high speed internet?
Lily: *looks at Daddy like he's crazy* Nope
Daddy: *sad face*

Monday, February 4, 2013

This is my friendly Zombie

Lily: (in teacher voice) Where do we protect our brains?
Mommy: in our heads?
Lily: right! We protect our brains in our heads...from the ZOMBIES! Mommy? Do zombies eat brains?
Mommy: yes, baby.
Lily: not THIS zombie. (Points to new imaginary zombie friend) THIS zombie is a FRIENDLY zombie. He eats chicken.
Andrew: (in complete seriousness) Yep. Chicken.