Wednesday, October 30, 2013

Recent Artwork

In answer to the bible school question, Lily drew Andrew. We aren't sure why he has so many teeth. 

Twilight Sparkle & Pinky Pie from My Little Ponies in both play dough & ink. 

Former president George W Bush and current president stripes, because that's what ALL the stylish people right on up to Jesus wear in Lily's artwork. 

After she got Glenda in her Happy Meal and demanded to watch Wizard of Oz. 

The remarkable part of this drawing is that the random figure is being plagued by the mosquito pictured in the top left corner. "But Maurice! Why you gotta bite me like that?"

Self portrait--the random dots on her face are freckles. 

At Lowes for a free kids craft day with Daddy. Lowe's provided all the pieces and tools. Daddy provided the thumb to smash--which, remarkably, she only did once before completing her super-cool monster game. They even let her keep her apron and goggles, which she wore proudly all day, proclaiming to everyone she met that she was now a "master builder."

Monday, October 28, 2013

Babies and Fish

Dr. Tadvick has asked us to consider his recommendation of an induction in a week. He leaves for us to discuss.

Daddy: Lily, what do you think? Should we have a baby next week?
Lily: (thinks) I think having a baby would be so so so much more special than having a fish.
Daddy: Ok then...I think Lily's on board.

Thursday, October 24, 2013

The Lady with Spiky Hair

Upon entering the restroom at Target...

Spiky Haired Woman: Oh honey! When are you due!?
Mommy: November 8.
Spiky Haired Woman: Oh honey! Are you gonna make it!?
Mommy: (Just smiles and walks into stall)
Lily: (loudly) I don't like her hair. It's too spiky!
Mommy: Lily! That's not polite! We should complement people not insult them. If there's something you don't like about someone, find something you DO like. Maybe her shoes or her coat?
Lily: (thinks) I don't like her shoes or her coat either!
Mommy: Well if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all!

...and that's when it occurred to me that I was defending the feelings of a woman who had basically just called me "fat."

Later on, Lily drew Spiky Haired Woman. It's a shockingly accurate likeness.
Well, except for the stripes. See also the bathroom stall on the left, the sink on the right, and the ridiculous amount of mascara. 

Thursday, October 3, 2013

But Why Isn't Jello Here Yet?

Lily: (as we are fixing our tea) Mommy, are you going to share your tea with Jello?
Mommy: Yes Ma'am. Right now I HAVE to share with Jello. 
Lily: When she comes out I'll be ready to share with her too. 

Miss Stephanie: So does Jello have an inedible name yet?
Lily: Yep! It's (censored). But it's a secret. (Thinks a minute) I'm not good at keeping secrets. 

(After Uncle Toph and Auntie Marnie's big announcement that they are also having a baby)
Daddy: Did you hear that!? Auntie Marnie is growing you a cousin! In November, Jello will be born and five months after that, Chili Pepper will be born. 
Lily: FIVE WHOLE MONTHS?!?! ::exasperated sigh::

To the high-school-aged, male cashier at United...
Cashier: How are you doing today?
Lily: (from two feet below the edge of the counter) I'm doing great! I'm getting a baby sister. She's in my mommy's tummy right now, but she's coming out soon. She has a name, but I can't tell you because it's a secret. I don't want to spoil the secret. 
Cashier: (peers over counter and smiles at Lily, a little unsure what to do) Well, congratulations. 

While getting into the truck--where Lily now has to climb by herself because Mommy can't hold her AND reach the truck at the same time due to a really big unborn baby sister...
Lily: Mommy, when you have Jello will you be able to pick things up again?
Mommy: yep
Lily: And bend over again?
Mommy: yep
Lily: and do ALL the motions to the songs in Bible Class?
Mommy: (laughs) Yep. Are you ready for the baby to come?
Lily: Yep. 

The Little Boy and The Bunny Machine

The Little Boy and The Bunny Machine
A Dry Erase Drawing by Lily Lemmons, Age 4

(Explanation as dictated to and 
paraphrased by Mommy)
"On the left is the bunny machine 
and on the right is the little boy. He 
always wanted a house full of bunnies 
but his parents told him no. They didn't 
want to feed them! But he is nice and 
will feed them and pay for the food all
by himself because he's NOT silly like me!"